All Apologies: A Letter to The Parking Lot Assh*le 1  

Dear “man” I threw my coffee at this morning, I am sorry: throwing my coffee at you should not have been my first reaction, and thankfully it wasn’t; I allowed you to berate me for a good five minutes before that. I am sorry that I allowed your words to affect me to the point where I actually wanted to hurl coffee at someone. I feel bad that you didn’t have someone while growing up who cared enough to teach you empathy, kindness, and compromise. When your choice (after being asked to move your car over so I could get in mine later) was to call me a fat bitch, I was certain that no one in your life has taken the time to teach you how to play well with others. I am sorry I reacted to you the way I did. Screaming back at you showed my own lack of empathy and compromise, but I think you will agree that your reaction to my simple, and nicely proffered, request was a tad over the top. I wished, for a minute, that your mother had been there to hear what you said to me but then I realized she probably would have been right […]

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Deprogramming Women 101 – Find Your Tribe

There seems to be a lot more talk in my life lately about women needing to be kinder to one another and while I am all for it,  I am finding that there is a lot of talk happening out of one side of people’s mouths. Who hasn’t “pledged” to be better to her sisters in vaginahood one second, and criticized a woman for something in the next? I’ll tell you who: every single one of us. I just did it this morning, only this time I was judging myself. A lovely girl sat next to me on the train and I wondered what it was like to be so slim, and it hit me like a frying pan to the face: how did I become so inured to degrading my own value? When did I completely buy into measuring my value as a woman against a magazine rack full of size 2’s? The early and constant brainwashing in the media, our own mothers and sisters teaching us to “suck it in and put some lipstick on” or we’d never “find a man” – we’re doomed before we even know what we are doomed to. I think I found a way […]